Social Life (At Least Have Some Fun!)
Time goes by too fast!
Time for Fun
Dear Tanya,
I’ve been wanting to get together with my friends for a while now. But I’m overwhelmed with life and the days seem to go by so fast! A week will go by and suddenly I realize I haven’t planned anything or invited anyone to do anything for a long time. Sometimes I may go days or weeks without talking to any friends. I want to have a social life, but I can’t seem to make it work. I know, just call someone. But it’s not so easy when I don’t seem to notice time passing and I am an introvert too!
What do you suggest I do? What’s your take?
-Overwhelmed and lonely
***Obviously these letters are fiction, but they are based on real life scenarios. I am here to ENCOURAGE you to get out of your comfort zone and help you confidently start living life together.
This has been my number one goal- get people together! Click the link below for a free printable planner that does the thinking for you, you just follow the steps.
Dear Overwhelmed,
Oooo I totally understand. You are not alone! I’m convinced in my home there are no Tuesdays or Wednesdays, they just disappear so fast and suddenly it’s Thursday and I’m behind on my list and I haven’t spoken to a soul who doesn’t live under my roof.
It is for this very reason that I host a small group in my home every other week. I call it my GLADS night. Girls Laughing and Doing Stuff together. It is list of pre-set dates and times, and everyone plans around attending it. Each set of nights has slightly different friends, and this allows others to meet new people!
I know, that sounds overwhelming. You have to take action if you want something to change. For now, just start small by following these steps and putting yourself out there for some fun.
“You have to take action if you want something to change.”
Follow These Steps:
Step 1: If your days or weeks are flying by, the best thing you can do for yourself is to schedule your play time. It’s important to set aside that time for yourself, or it doesn’t happen!
Step 2: Call a friend, send out a group text, make a facebook post or even ask around at places you visit. You’d be surprised how many people are wanting some fun and friendship!
Step 3: Look at your own schedule and pick a time and date (stay within the next few weeks) that you are both available.
Step 4: Pick what you want to do together. Go to a movie? Meet at a new café or park? Sit around your kitchen table and talk? Try something new?
Helpful Suggestions to begin your journey
Botanical Gardens or Local Parks are excellent places to go to enjoy nature and visit with friends!
Breakfast or an early lunch fits best in my schedule when I find myself in this time flux. It is early enough in the day that I am not so bogged down in my list that I feel guilty for taking me-time. I also don’t have all day to think about having to be social and thinking about canceling (Introverts unite).
If you are not well acquainted with the person, order pastry or a bowl of soup. These can be eaten quickly if needed and is usually the least expensive things on the menu.
You don’t have to invest hours! Set an end time and stick with it. Even an hour is enough time to socialize and give yourself the break you need.
On the off chance you realize you’ve made a mistake and don't want to spend much time with the person, (this has happened to me!) rely on the set end time you had. :) I know it sounds terrible, but sometimes we don’t have that friend connection or find there is nothing in common and it gets uncomfortable. This is OKAY! You don’t need to become besties with everyone, so let yourself off the hook and chalk it up as experience and just enjoy the time out. You accomplished your goal of getting out!
Try piggybacking off another planned event. My friends and I have a set dinner, once a month, centered around a Womens event at our church. We meet at a local restaurant, either trying a new one or a favorite, 2 hours before the event starts. Even if the event doesn’t happen, for whatever reason, we have made that time a priority and still meet. This protects us from that time vortex that makes gathering feel so impossible, it’s already set up!
Realize these steps may be hard for you and give yourself grace. Especially if you are an introvert and tire easily when being social (me). You can do this, just take it slow!
As you set up these outings (and do them), it will get easier and you may find others saying they wished they’d have known, they wanted to go to X too. Remember their name! (This is a great opportunity to start a group!)
HOMEWORK: Someone been on your mind lately? Call that person and schedule something, anything, now!
-Tanya